An Unhelpful Misconception about Independent Church Plants

My husband is the Pastor of an Independent Church Plant.

And there is unhelpful misconception about Independent Church Plants.

It's not always stated, though occasionally hinted at in suspicious gazes and passive aggressive comments.

The misconception relates to why you would plant an Independent church.

The first relates to church planting itself- you plant a church because you think that existing churches either aren't doing a good job, or they are unable to do evangelism.

The second relates to being independent- that you plant an independent church because you think that existing denominations aren't doing a good job, or they are unable to do evangelism.

Basically, when some people see an independent church plant, they see a church that by its very existence is judging their own church and finding it wanting.

Now, don't get me wrong.  There are some people out there who believe that their church is the only effective church, the only true church, the only church that Jesus approves of.  The correct term for them is a cult.

But in my experience, most church plants, independent or not, are not like that at all.

Do you want to know a secret?  I grew up in a denominational church.  I became a Christian in a denominational church.  That church had been planted around 50 years before I was born (I know, there's even a little history book about it).

And not only that.  I love denominational churches.  I thank God for the ways that he has worked through the years through so many different churches.

When my friends in ministry pray and decide that they are going to be Anglicans or Pressies or Baptists, I thank God.

So why would anyone plant an independent church, if Denominations can be good?

Because there is so much work to do.

Australia is growing, and has been growing for a long time.  The ratio of number of churches to number of people continues to balloon out.  If all we had was existing churches, while our population swelled, how would we reach them all?  We need new churches.

And why do we need independent churches?  Well, it's not so much the independence that is good (in fact, we have joined networks and fellowships and Tim has various pastor friends and mentors to make sure we aren't that independent at all), but the fact that we need different churches to reach different people.  Our society is changing, and their will always be people who will not be drawn towards traditional models of church.  "Independent" churches, for want of a better word, have some unique flexibilities which can help them to reach people in different ways.

We need to get these issues out in the open and work together.  Celebrate our differences.  Realise how God can work through us all in different ways.

You might be wondering why I would write this post in a blog dedicated to church planting wives.  I think these issues need to be discussed.  My observation and experience is that when these kind of misconceptions fester in the background, they can really hurt relationships between ministries wives.  We are all caught up in what can be a difficult and isolating role. 

It's important that rather than judging each other and particularly our husband's ministry choices, that we encourage each other.

Because the harvest is plentiful, and there is much to do.  So let's do it together.

Belinda

A Point of Thanks

Last Sunday I was watching television. Surfing the channels I found myself on "meTV", watching Joel Osteen give a message. I had heard things about this man, both from Tim and others, that made me curious about whether I would hear a prosperity Gospel.

He talked about a tree, I think it's Japanese tree, that spends four years putting down roots, but only in the fifth year does it start to flourish. He then shared that for those listening who were suffering, their fifth year was coming. Soon God would bless then, financially and spiritually. He even made the point that this wasn't heavenly blessing, but blessing for now. Prosperity rubbish, and I only watched for five minutes.

As I listened, I felt sad, but I also felt my heart well up with thankfulness.  Because, while there are many stresses for me each Sunday (will Sunday school work well, will this person be back, will I have the energy to make it through, will we have enough food?), there is one thing I never even think to worry about. I know that when my husband opens his mouth, he will speak the Gospel. He will tell what the Bible says. He will preach the truth, even when it's tough to hear. He will not preach another Gospel (Galatians 1:8), he will not preach what people's itching ears want to hear (2 Timothy 4:3). He works hard, every week, to share the Bible's message with all of us at Grace.  And that is a great thing, for me as a listener who needs to be feed and changed, and as a member of a church family all in the same boat.

I can trust my husband to speak God's word. And while I don't think to thank God for it often, I should. Because, as we all need to remember, if you don't have the Gospel at your plant church, you might as well just be watching meTV.

Belinda

The Gospel voice

Happy New Year!

It's funny, thinking about the year ahead.

I'm a little bit ashamed as I look through my list of new years resolutions.  I failed miserably.  Some, because I was over ambitious.  Some because I was lazy.  Some because I had no idea what a huge drain on my time and energy church planting would be.

But thinking about the year ahead, I am very aware of my own limitations.  God willing, Tim and I will be welcoming twins into the outside world in late May.  And so as I think about the year ahead, I am so much more conscious of the things I will be unable to do, rather than the things I hope to achieve.

But there is one thing that I am praying particularly, in relation to my relationship with Tim, that I hope will always be the case, even when I'm overwhelmed with two gorgeous little people to feed, change, cuddle and love.

I want to be the Gospel voice in his ear.

On a staff retreat for my AFES (University Ministry) job, we were reading through 1 Timothy 3, looking at the qualifications for a Christian overseer.  And it was pretty overwhelming, as a group of Christian leaders in some form, to look over the qualifications of Christian overseers and deacons.  Of course, nothing on this list you wouldn't want to strive for as any Christian (godliness, faithfulness in marriage, etc).  But it was challenging none the less, particularly as I thought about the ones in which I am weak myself.

But as I thought of Tim as a Christian overseer, I wondered what I could do to help him as he strives to live up to this list.  My boss jokingly suggested I could "nag" him, but I knew that wasn't the answer. :)  Prayer, I knew was a pretty integral part, and maybe that part of it is a post for another day.

But one thing that really struck me was the end of the passage.

And most certainly, the mystery of godliness is great:

He was manifested in the flesh,
vindicated in the Spirit,
seen by angels,
preached among the nations,
believed on in the world,
taken up in glory.

 

So weird!  When you hear a sentence "The mystery of godliness is great:" you expect to see something else afterwards, don't you?  Maybe something about the Spirit?  Or good works?  But instead it goes on to go through the Gospel, to point us to Christ.  The answer to the mystery of godliness is the Gospel- that Jesus becomes our godliness for us.  That our godliness is taken care of when we could never do it.  But it is also the Gospel that enables us to be the leaders that we are suppose to me.  It is looking at Jesus, at his example, at what he has done for us, that inspires us to live out the beginnings of the chapter!

 

I may not be up to much this year.  But I'm praying, admits the lack of sleep and the stress, that I will remember the Gospel, and also that I will be reminding Tim of it.  That I will be the Gospel voice in his ear, constantly reminding him of Christ and what he's done.  And no doubt I will need the favour returned :)

 

Last post I talked about not being the hand-break.  My new aim is to be the Gospel accelerator.

 

Okay, very Corny.  But important nonetheless.

Belinda

A Helper not a Hand-Break

My husband Tim is a really creative communicator.  It is one of things that helps him to be a really engaging preacher, and one of the things that I love about him.  But he has a way of putting things that often is quite powerful, and sometimes that can be a bit confronting.

The other day was one of those times.  We were talking about something that he had been thinking about in relation to church planting, and I was "talking him out of it".  And he said to me a very thought-provoking phrase that has been running through my head ever since.  "Darling, I need a wife, not a hand-brake".

It is a powerful image.

It is particularly powerful because Tim is the car-driver in our relationship, and I am usually sitting in the passenger seat next door.  And I was immediately struck with the picture of Tim, driving along and me just reaching out and putting on the hand-brake.  I know from a few forgetful incidents: you can still drive with the hand-brake on, but it is definitely a hindrance.

And I suspect this is a common issue within church planting marriages.

My observation, of Tim and others, is that church planters are dreamers and ideas men.  They are risk-takers who are willing to try things.  You would be hard pressed to find someone who was willing to try church planting who wasn't a risk taker! :)  But that doesn't mean that their wives are the same.  And while I definitely have some risk taker in me, I am a deliberate thinker and planner.  I like to have things sorted out.  I immediately think through the problems and hurdles and practicalities in any plan.  And this too is a strength, and one that partners well with Tim's.

But how do I use it?

My temptation is just to let my fears rise up and to just list off the problems straight away.  To be the hand-break.  But that is not helpful.  What Tim needs is a wife.  Someone to listen.  Someone to take seriously his ideas.  That doesn't mean that I don't talk through my concerns, that doesn't mean that I don't raise the practicalities.  It just means that my first response is to listen, not to put on the hand-brake.  I want to take Proverbs 18:13 as my mantra "To speak without listening, that is folly and shame.

And so often, when I do listen, when I do think, when I do wait, I realise the idea is actually great, and I find myself thinking "How can I help Tim make this happen?" rather than "How can I talk Tim out of this?"  And even if I'm still unsure, Tim is the leader of the church and I need to be the first in line to trust and follow him.

As I write this post, I can't help thinking about the year that has been, and how far I have fallen short in serving Tim.  How many times I have been a hand-break rather than a helper! How thankful I am for grace (the gift from God, not the church this time!).  None of us get these things right, wives or husbands.  But Father God in his grace uses faulty people to grow his kingdom and plant his churches.  And he forgives and his Spirit changes us to be more like his Son.

Father, please help me to be a helper not a handbrake.  Amen
Belinda

"Church Planter's Wife"?

When I was first asked about writing a blog like this, I wrote about it on one of my other blogs.  And a friend immediately came back to me with a very helpful and interesting question.

Why a blog about being a church planters "wife"?  Aren't you church planting too, same as Tim?".

It's a questions that I've been pondering ever since.

The friend had commented this partly because they had observed in the way I had talked about Grace, I had shown how excited I was about what we were doing, how involved I was, how much Tim and I worked together in the process.

And when you look at my working week, and what I do, I think its fair to say that I am pretty involved.  In many ways I "work" for the church the same way that I work in University ministry, my other two days a week.  The only difference is that I'm not paid for it.  But its still ministry, and its still (under God) an important part of church planting.

And this, I find is the reality for most people I know who are wives involved in a church plant.  There may be some women out there, for whom work or family means that they have no involvement with serving at church (be it meeting with women, teaching Sunday School, setting up chairs, whatever).  But I'm yet to meet that women :).  I think that is partly the nature of church planting- that there is much to do and limited resources and everyone (whether they are part of an initial "couple" or not) all end up doing something.

So, should I just make this blog about being "A female church planter" or "A member of a church planting team"?

No.

Because there is something unique in this position that I am in.  And it was talking to Tim after this initial question that helps me clarify what I was already feeling.

When I asked Tim what he thought about the title "Church planter's wife", he made an interesting observation.  His concern with the title was mainly in the fact that he didn't like being called "A Church Planter"!  He felt it was unhelpful because Church planting was a team effort, and many of the people in the church were involved in "church planting".  Not just him.  He said his preferred way of talking about his role was as "A Church plant leader".

And in many ways, its the 'leadership' involved in church planting, not just the church planting itself, that has such unique struggles.  It's the pressure, it's the decision making, it's the expectations, it's the 'buck stops with you' nature that makes Church Planting Leading, in many ways, a  unique Christian ministries.  It is an incredibly demanding role.  It is also a bit of a lonely role.

And in that world, I have an important part to play.  I am the partner.  I am the support.  I am the cheers squad.  I am the one who is on his side no matter what.   And while everything I do for the church plant is important, this being a support to Tim is actually one of the most important things, because no one else in his life (besides Jesus of course!) has such power to encourage him in what he is doing. And not just in a "good job honey" kind of way.  I can be someone who points him to Jesus and the Gospel.  But more about that in future posts.

So, I guess I would describe myself as a Church Plant leader's wife.  And even though that doesn't sound quite as glamorous as a "church planter", it's actually a really important job.  And a really hard job.

And that's why I hope to encourage others in it.  Because it is unique, and it's hard.  And it's so important.
Belinda

Why "Planting Partner", and who am I?

My name is Belinda.  I love writing, cooking, walking, talking (alot) and spending time with people.  I live in Melbourne, and I love it.  I loath housework and have a great fear of wild snakes and wild mice (domestic, friendly versions of both are acceptable).  I hope the snakes eat the mice, and then go far away from me!

I also love Jesus.  He is my Saviour and Lord and I want him to be honoured in my life.  I am so grateful that he loves and forgives me, despite my sin! And my passion is that others would come to know the life that is found in him.

So, why I am starting this blog?

Well, at the start of this year, my husband and I took on the task of starting a new church (commonly known as a "church plant") in the Box Hill area of Melbourne.  We began with a small team, and began meeting to learn from Gods word, to grow in our love of God and each other, and to pray for our friends who didn't know Jesus.  We are now around 30 people.

We are also part of an organisation called "Geneva", which is a network for church planters.  And I was asked by Geneva if I would be interested in blogging about the unique challenges of being a church-plant leader's wife.

This might seem a very specific subject!  But I have found over this year that there are very specific challenges in my situation; very unique joys and struggles.  I hope that somehow sharing some of my thinking and experiences, both as a member of a church planting team and as a wife of a church-plant leader, I might be able to encourage people both who are involved in church plants, but also those who are serving in any churches, or who are involved in ministry-marriages.

I don't claim to be an expert.  I am a learner and a sinner.  But I pray and hope as a stubble through the challenges of being a planting partner, that it might be an instructive and helpful process for others, as it has been for me.

In Christ,
Belinda